Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Naughty mama, naughty papa, naughty.....

That's the new thing going around the house. Alysha going around saying naughty mama everything she gets upset with me, naughty papa, etc.

I worry sometimes whether she will resent me for all the punishment that she gets for being naughty. Sometimes I think I punish her too much and don't let her be herself. Its just that I feel she needs to realize that for every action there will be a reaction, good and bad.

Should I let her get away with scribbling in her story book (she actually got away with this one as I realized she did it solely to get my attention), or ripping up Inarah's mat on the floor, or switching off the TV when Suben is watching, or just throwing things around the house instead of the dustbin, throwing coins instead of putting it in her piggy bank, biting into her pencils, writing on the wall, hitting kakak or papa when she is upset, screaming at one of us when she is upset, ah! the list could go on and on

I know they seem very trivial (except hitting someone for which she never gets away w/o a punishment) but if I do let her get away with the rest, wont she just keep doing them again and again. On the other hand she is 3 1/2 and maybe too young to be punished for some of these things. Am I being too harsh on her?

Its so tough being a mother, being expected to do the right thing, to be firm yet loving. They don't teach any of this in any school, how would I know what to do ?

Sometimes I feel I fail so badly at motherhood.

7 Comments:

At 5:47 PM, Blogger geetha said...

Aaah, may she is trying to get your attention over her lil sister. But she definitely needs to be conditioned, if necessary.

I too experience the same thing.. but now my boy is okay.. he has learnt.

Don't feel bad. Sometimes we have to do what we have to do. In my case, hubby doesn't really do much conditioning, so it's me.. the bad mummy. But if we do it right, they will still feel loved ;)

 
At 6:00 PM, Blogger mjey said...

Hey,
Don't feel so bad - I am in the same shoes. And I feel lousy when someone compares my gal with other kids to say those kids don't behave like mine. I wonder where am I going wrong. But of course some kids are not as bright as yours and mine too...so thats our consolations...they will grow out of the naughtiness - I HOPE!

 
At 6:06 PM, Blogger mumsgather said...

I'm a naughty mama too, according to my 4 year old.

 
At 11:22 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please don't think you've failed in motherhood!You only have your child's best interest at heart.You're feeling bad because your punishments may be a little too harsh.Don't you just feel like crying when your child tells you not to hit him or when he asks why you hit him???If only you could undo what you just did!

 
At 5:34 PM, Blogger shri said...

it's so hard isn't it? i have to say though, that it feels good to know that you feel this way too - it means that i'm not the only one - which means that neither of us can be as bad at it as we think we are, right?

 
At 11:31 PM, Blogger GoofyJ said...

here is my opinion (and it is just my opinion): if you don't teach now, when will you? I firmly believe that it is while he children are young that they need to be taught. I also believe that you need to be consistent, changing streams now might teach her she can get away with a lot of things. Also my mother always tells me to be sure to pick my battles. If you feel this way maybe there is one thin that doesn't mean a lot to you that you can re-evaluate. One of my daughters can be very difficult, and I feel this way often. But, I know that it is worth it, because if she can learn these things now, she will have an easier time when she is older. And, I would much rather deal with a rebellious 3 year old, than a rebellious 14 year old. I hope maybe this helps. Good luck! :)

 
At 11:31 PM, Blogger GoofyJ said...

here is my opinion (and it is just my opinion): if you don't teach now, when will you? I firmly believe that it is while he children are young that they need to be taught. I also believe that you need to be consistent, changing streams now might teach her she can get away with a lot of things. Also my mother always tells me to be sure to pick my battles. If you feel this way maybe there is one thin that doesn't mean a lot to you that you can re-evaluate. One of my daughters can be very difficult, and I feel this way often. But, I know that it is worth it, because if she can learn these things now, she will have an easier time when she is older. And, I would much rather deal with a rebellious 3 year old, than a rebellious 14 year old. I hope maybe this helps. Good luck! :)

 

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home